Wow, this was a hard one. I mean I had to pick something I’m an expert at and I was going to be all “Oh I’m an expert at being a parent because I have five kids.” Then shrugging my shoulders I declared no one is an expert at that. We all make mistakes. I might have 5 kids through different stages and for that I could say I’m an expert at the various stages but that isn’t what this is to me. So sit back because today’s post isn’t one of sweet childhood memories, and it won’t be about all the wonderful things I’ve done as an adult, instead this post is about to get serious.
Life isn’t always that big wonderful rainbow and fields of fun like many imagine, instead sometimes, some of us go through things that no one could imagine or would want to imagine. But it is those of us that have went through it, that know, we can survive and make it through anything. I think because of my own past I have been able to deal with life’s blows when they come, that is really why I’m as strong as I am.
Plain and simple, I am an expert at surviving. Surviving what you ask? Surviving at life and all it has to throw at me. I survived my parent’s divorce, which I must say sometimes it is something that is needed. My parents were never meant to stay together, when they were they fought all the time. Trust me, I remember. Later my dad would find the love of his life, the woman I also call my mom.
My biological mother would go down the wrong path for a long while and it would take me even longer before I forgave the past. During this time she took us right along with her and this is where I can say I survived life. I’m a survivor of sexual abuse (due to my biological mother which I will not dive into this subject right now) and hopefully one day I will be able to help someone out with my story or just to lend an ear where it is needed. She would also kidnap us after the divorce where we’d be on the run for a while. Trust me, hiding out, always jumpy and the driving through fields to get away from the cops is no way to live.
I survived her trying to be nice and let in people that shouldn’t, this person would try hurting us and end up killing a cop. To this day I’m very careful who I let in my home and always keep my doors locked. I survived putting my own mother behind bars, and as a pre-teen no one is nice about that. So as you can see, all this was before I’d turn 13. But I survived. Thanks to my loving dad and his wife (my mom) I would have some great memories to try to balance out all the bad stuff my biological mother had put me through. For the most part it helped a lot. But through my past I think I can say I survived growing up.
I survived being a military wife, my husband was in the military and would get sent to Iraq twice. I survived deployment. I dealt with all the PTSD whether people believe it is true or not. I saw this crud first hand and know what they go through and not just him but others. I know they yearn to tell someone what they saw and did over there, now the spouses won’t tell their wives but sometimes they’ll tell someone else. I never heard from my own what he experienced but I know what his co-workers went through.
I would later see how he’d have to live on the edge and risk everything to get that thrill back, even after we were out of the military. I survived this time. I also survived the trials in life as an adult, you know where you end up losing your home, living in hotels and have to get your life back together. That’s where I am now, I’ve been hanging on by a thread for these last few years but finally I see the silver lining and I can see it is in grasp I just have to wait a little longer for the clouds to roll away.
That’s when I will be able to say I’m debt free, I survived living cheap to get that. Above all, I have survived some really tough lessons, most would think it was a movie they were watching and no ones life but for me, I’ve lived it. Life can be fun, but it can also be cruel. Life can kick you 100 times when you are already down or let you fly so high only to pop that bubble when it is 1000s of feet in the sky. Life is crazy but I can say I am an expert at surviving all it has to throw my way. No matter what, I will survive.
What are you an expert at?