The Life of a Home Mom

I’m an Expert at Surviving


Wow, this was a hard one. I mean I had to pick something I’m an expert at and I was going to be all “Oh I’m an expert at being a parent because I have five kids.” Then shrugging my shoulders I declared no one is an expert at that. We all make mistakes. I might have 5 kids through different stages and for that I could say I’m an expert at the various stages but that isn’t what this is to me. So sit back because today’s post isn’t one of sweet childhood memories, and it won’t be about all the wonderful things I’ve done as an adult, instead this post is about to get serious.

Life isn’t always that big wonderful rainbow and fields of fun like many imagine, instead sometimes, some of us go through things that no one could imagine or would want to imagine. But it is those of us that have went through it, that know, we can survive and make it through anything. I think because of my own past I have been able to deal with life’s blows when they come, that is really why I’m as strong as I am.

Plain and simple, I am an expert at surviving. Surviving what you ask? Surviving at life and all it has to throw at me. I survived my parent’s divorce, which I must say sometimes it is something that is needed. My parents were never meant to stay together, when they were they fought all the time. Trust me, I remember. Later my dad would find the love of his life, the woman I also call my mom.

My biological mother would go down the wrong path for a long while and it would take me even longer before I forgave the past. During this time she took us right along with her and this is where I can say I survived life. I’m a survivor of sexual abuse (due to my biological mother which I will not dive into this subject right now) and hopefully one day I will be able to help someone out with my story or just to lend an ear where it is needed. She would also kidnap us after the divorce where we’d be on the run for a while. Trust me, hiding out, always jumpy and the driving through fields to get away from the cops is no way to live.

I survived her trying to be nice and let in people that shouldn’t, this person would try hurting us and end up killing a cop. To this day I’m very careful who I let in my home and always keep my doors locked. I survived putting my own mother behind bars, and as a pre-teen no one is nice about that. So as you can see, all this was before I’d turn 13. But I survived. Thanks to my loving dad and his wife (my mom) I would have some great memories to try to balance out all the bad stuff my biological mother had put me through. For the most part it helped a lot. But through my past I think I can say I survived growing up.

I survived being a military wife, my husband was in the military and would get sent to Iraq twice. I survived deployment. I dealt with all the PTSD whether people believe it is true or not. I saw this crud first hand and know what they go through and not just him but others. I know they yearn to tell someone what they saw and did over there, now the spouses won’t tell their wives but sometimes they’ll tell someone else. I never heard from my own what he experienced but I know what his co-workers went through.

I would later see how he’d have to live on the edge and risk everything to get that thrill back, even after we were out of the military. I survived this time. I also survived the trials in life as an adult, you know where you end up losing your home, living in hotels and have to get your life back together. That’s where I am now, I’ve been hanging on by a thread for these last few years but finally I see the silver lining and I can see it is in grasp I just have to wait a little longer for the clouds to roll away.

That’s when I will be able to say I’m debt free, I survived living cheap to get that. Above all, I have survived some really tough lessons, most would think it was a movie they were watching and no ones life but for me, I’ve lived it. Life can be fun, but it can also be cruel. Life can kick you 100 times when you are already down or let you fly so high only to pop that bubble when it is 1000s of feet in the sky. Life is crazy but I can say I am an expert at surviving all it has to throw my way. No matter what, I will survive.

What are you an expert at?

39 thoughts on “I’m an Expert at Surviving

  1. Wow, you’ve certainly had quite a journey and my gosh, you should wear that survivor badge proudly. I’ve been through some things but nothing like that.

  2. Robin (Masshole Mommy) says:

    You have definitely survived your fair share of tough situations over the course of your life!

  3. Today’s prompt was a hard one for me because at first I just couldn’t think of what I’m an expert at. This got me to think about all the times someone has told me that I was strong because of this or that or how I should teach a course in such and such. What are you an expert at?

  4. My husband was in the army too and it was def. hard. Hugs and I am proud of you for surviving!

  5. Thank you. Yes, when I first married my Marine I was told how tough the life would be but being a military child (my dad was A.Force) I thought it was a cinch. Problem was my family never moved, but within the first year of marriage my husband was sent to Japan and we were left on our own in the states. For most of it I was fine, but it was what it did to THEM after Iraq that would be the hard part. All the deployments and trainings helped me for today. Hugs back to you. It was hard but I think figuring out life outside the military has been my toughest one yet.

  6. @blueviolet Mays I really need to write my story but every time I get stuck in the middle. Guess just not certain how it should be just yet, maybe it isn’t time yet. Yeah I’ve been through a lot but I don’t like to think about it like that. I always tell myself someone else has been through more, be thankful for what I didn’t have to go through and might have if it kept going. I use to be more ashamed to talk about my past but in the past few years I’ve grown to be proud of it. Not of it actually but of overcoming it, turning out the way I did instead of going a different route.

  7. Surviving is an excellent skill to have. Life is not always lemonade and it takes the downs to appreciate the ups. I hope you have many more ups to come so that you can take a break on the surviving part.

  8. I never claim to be an expert.. i would say i know allot of something,but not an expert.. From your story you are a survivor of so many thing.. congrats on that

  9. I was going to say that I am an expert at making mistakes, but decided to say that I am an expert at keeping on trying.

  10. You share such powerful parts of yourself in this post. It makes me see how real you are and how strong you are. In your writing it sounds like your outlook is very positive, which is why you must be such a survivor. Thank you for sharing your story and for being an inspiration to me.

  11. Ellen That Chic Mom says:

    What a wonderful attitude as someone who truly has survived, I truly hope that silver lining is coming and you are at the end of survival mode but can enjoy and thrive!

  12. I can totally relate to how difficult it is being a military spouse. Life has thrown a lot at you, but what’s important is that you keep getting up. You are a survivor indeed.

  13. I agree it isn’t all about lemonade and you do have to go through the bad to enjoy the good. Knowing what types of bad can happen really makes you happy when something good does come along. I hope you have a lot of ups in your life too Andi.

  14. How can anyone deny that going to war causes PTSD? How can it not? I think we’re all survivors of living, only the brave ones are able to talk about it.

  15. I have so much respect for women (and men) who live this life. I could never do it, ever. I am clingy and needy. It’s just the truth. You are amazing, this entire story shows your power. <3


  16. Catherine S says:

    You have been through a lot and it is great to see how positive you are. Keep going day by day and you will get to that silver lining.

  17. What a journey you’ve had but it’s good that you still have a good attitude . I’m a survivor too, especially over the past 2 years. I sometimes will call my mom and tell her I’m surprised I’m not locked up in a padded room with all the stuff that’s been going on. In the end I look at it as learning to be strong , especially when it’s all you can and have to do. And learning how strong you actually are in different situations.

  18. I love that you think no one is an expert on parenting! I think that is so true. My husband (boyfriend at the time) did 3 tours. Thank you and your husband for your service and sacrifice.

  19. Wow, what a journey you have been on. Thankful to have people like you and your husband who serve this country.

  20. And, I’m taking inspiration from you right now. Your post is very timely. I’m going through something right now and I so want to get out of it, but your post is very enlightening and at the same time encouraging. You’re such a strong person with a good heart.

  21. This would be a tough one for me to write as well.I’m thinking after all that, you deserve a medal. Or a big ole badge at least!

  22. I am SO proud of you! You are such a strong lady and you’ve endured SO much in your lifetime. You ARE a master at surviving. You keep your chin up because you are amazing <3

  23. Holy cow, you sure have been through a lot! I can’t even imagine what that life was like with your biological mom. So tough. Very thankful you had your dad and “step”mom there to fill in the need for good moments growing up. I hope your husband is able to get help with his PTSD! I would imagine it’s hard for everyone when they come back! Just keep swimming!

  24. What a great journey it has been. I know a lot of survivor will be proud and you’re one of those. Keep it up and inspire a lot of your readers.

  25. Yes it was pretty bad but like I said I want to be able to one day say I helped someone. That way it makes something so ugly turn into something beautiful. As for many with PTSD they refuse to seek help. Have a great weekend!

  26. You are a survivor! I have two friends who are military wives to and I have an idea how it is. What more, if your spouse will be sent to Iraq. I guess I wouldn’t be able to sleep every night thinking how he is doing. But anyway, you made it, you’ll make it forever! Wishing you great future ahead! We’ll be reading your posts.

  27. Surviving and not letting it keep you down is definitely a great skill to have.

  28. I love your perspective. I, too, am a survivor, with a very bad upbringing, not terribly unlike your own. I love that I was able to take those experiences and turn my life around to be nothing like it was growing up. I was able to break the cycle and I try to be the best mom I can be to my own children. I enjoyed your post.

  29. I’m glad that you are seeing a silver lining now. My son is in the military and he has a wife and little one. He’s talking about getting out next year instead of re-enlisting, and though I am so proud of him for serving, I do hope he finishes up so he won’t be sent away from them.

  30. You are one very strong individual, and I’m happy for you that things are starting to smooth out, and going better.

  31. You really are a survivor. I can not imagine raising five kids it must take a lot of strength some days. I grew up in a Military family and understand the struggles they go threw.

  32. Bonnie @ wemake7 says:

    I too have 5 children and have been through quite a bit and then some and still am today. I guess I’m an Expert at survival as well although at times it doesn’t feel that way.

  33. The tough times just make us tougher. HUGS

  34. You have definitely survived a lot. It it is an accomplishment to be proud of for sure!

  35. Wow! That’s a whole bunch of surviving! You forgave your past you said and I think that’s amazing. I still struggle letting parts of my childhood go. That’s a major accomplishment!

  36. Notorious Spinks says:

    Glad you make it through. I’m an expert at laughing…laugh to keep from crying.

  37. I’m sorry that you had to go through so many struggles, but I believe that the hard times help us appreciate the good times! I believe that the second half of your life will be blessed!

  38. I’m always trying to aquire new skills. Perhaps I’m an expert at being more in touch with myself, my feelings and why I do things than I ever was before.

  39. 5 kids is enough for me, the other stuff.. wow just wow.. I’m in the middle of a divorce with four kids, it’s not as nice, but i try to make it as easy as i can for my kids, because i don’t want a rough childhood for them.. this hits home.. also **hugs**

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