To My Younger Self:
I’m not really sure what to tell you. Ummm we are currently a month before we turn 37 and have 5 kids. Yes, I said 5. I know you weren’t even considering kids your Senior year but you ended up having 5. Actually our oldest child will be graduating this school year. Wow right? haha bet that is blowing your mind right?
Sometimes in life people are going to say things that they don’t really know much about. They say what they think is right, in reality they just don’t always know. In your case, they were wrong. See, those people didn’t know what they were talking about because you will do anything for your kids. You love them so much you can’t even begin to contemplate the amount at this age.
Your Senior Year will be full of Trials, it’s Okay
All you know is it is your senior year and you are having a difficult life at the moment. Before I move on I want to tell you that you have such a relationship with your children that some will be jealous and not understand, others will hate you but the best part is your children adore you and you adore your children. You would do anything for your children. I want you to know that while it may seem terrible and hard right now, you will get through this time period. Everything you do in life, you do it for them.
What Your Future Holds
You will get married to Daniel and stay married. Yes, that means you had all 5 children with him. You aren’t remarried, divorced, single or anything like that. But you are a home mom, shocker right? No, you did not go off and join the Coast Guard or any other service and ya’ll didn’t stay in the military. He would go as far as he could but they won’t let him re-enlist. I tell you this now in case by some miracle I could go back and read this and fix a few errors. He will believe they are keeping him in until a month before he is booted to which he will need to find a job. There will be a downward spiral while he goes through this time, it will almost ruin you, but somehow you all manage to pull through.
Dear Younger Self, Forgiveness Does Come.
During the next 18 years of your life you will go through so many trials, in fact no one would ever believe them if they read them. You wouldn’t even believe them and in just your 18 years you have a ton of stories to tell. I know you don’t like thinking about the past right now, but in 18 years you will have forgiven for the past. You know that what happened happened and there is nothing anyone can do to change it. You will finally accept it and start moving away from the anger and the pain. You will find you move about 18 different times and not all will be military moves, in fact you will find yourself living in hotels more often then not. Eventually you will move away from it in order to improve the life of your children. You will end up back in the state of which everything happened, but due to this you will recover from your past at the same time. You just need to write that book.
To My Younger Self Life May Get Derailed but it Gets back on Track
You will find that your life is full of hard times, laughter, love, friendships and so much more. Some of those friendships will end and you will think you can’t move on with your life but somewhere inside you you’ll move forward. You will wish the best for everyone. You will understand why some friendships have to end and others must begin.
Keep Getting Back Up
Your life will change in so many ways, each time something bad happens do NOT believe it can’t get worse, trust me, it can and it will for a long time. Every time your life seems to get on track it will get derailed. I would say try to save money and not let everything get spent but there is nothing you can do. Don’t beat yourself up over it because trust me, you will and it won’t do anyone any good.
Dear Younger Self, Remember Your Life is Already Planned for You. Just Live it.
My advice to you is just to live life, try and be happy. I don’t recommend changing anything because those five kids you have there are great and you know how I believe. Changing one thing, changes everything. You’ll end up in places you wish you weren’t, you’ll wish for things you don’t have and eventually it’ll all work out how it is suppose to work out, the only bad thing is you will never know when or how that is suppose to be. Sorry I’m not much of an optimistic person like we use to be but I’ve learned life throws you lemons and when it does it hurts, but eventually you start using those lemons to your advantage.