An Angel in the Courthouse Bathroom

Have you ever stopped to ask why someone is a certain way? For me, I became who I am today because of an angel in the courthouse bathroom. But let me tell you how it happened and a little on why.

I went to Court

Did I ever tell you about the time I had to go to court in my preteen years? No, I did nothing wrong. But back then I thought everything was my fault. The entire world felt as if it was up on my shoulders and one wrong move could make a lot of people very upset. No matter what, people would be upset with whatever way the court decided, there was no win-win solution here.

I was the Key Witness

I was only about 11 when I had to face my perpetrators in court. The feeling of dread for this day was horrible. The sick feeling, the not wanting to get up or walk another step. Walls closing in. The sweats. What was worse was knowing it would be my testimony (a word I’d grow to hate) that would either let everyone go free or put everyone behind bars…well almost everyone.

I Would Put My Own Mother Behind Bars

See it was my biological mother I was facing in court. She was the one that had put everything in motion. It was my duty now to speak the truth and protect all those that I loved. How was I going to do this? I had to show I was no longer afraid. Truth was I was terrified and no one could tell me they truly understood or had been through what I had been through.  I was different, broken.  I trusted no one.

My Testimony Broke Me

I broke down in the middle of my testimony. My nerves were shot, my hands shaken, I was feeling dizzy and tears stung as they slid down my cheeks. The judge noticed my condition and decided it was time for a recess. He had a guard escort me to a bathroom just for me, only I wasn’t alone.

An Angel in the Courthouse Bathroom

The guard checked the bathroom before I entered, he even checked in the stalls. No one was there. All clear. Once inside I used the bathroom and went to wash my face. I wanted to give up. I didn’t want to go any further with my testimony. From here on, I knew I’d be putting people in prison, some may even kill me. What should I do? How could I get out of this?

As I was washing my face I saw a bright light from behind me (probably from the outside hitting the mirror) and an old lady came in. I wasn’t afraid of her, she seemed peaceful. She told me I should know my parents were both proud of me, even my Father was proud.

I couldn’t believe her, my parents weren’t proud. I was putting one in prison for a long time and I’d lied to the other for a few years. Why did she say parents and then Father? I didn’t understand, she must’ve mistaken me for someone else.

The Angel Had Vanished

I went to splash water on my face because I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. When I looked in the mirror she was gone. I checked the stalls no one was there, when I went into the hall I asked the guard. He quickly went inside but saw no one. He explained no one had gone in and as we approached the courtroom he told me to show him if I saw her in there. She wasn’t there. But I knew I had to give my testimony and if no one had seen her maybe I dreamed it.

My Angel Wrote Me

I gave the rest of my testimony and even though it was hard I stuck with it. By the end, my mother and the rest of the people involved would serve time. I wondered if I’d really be safe ever again, would the ones I couldn’t locate be arrested or would they come for me too. How many people now hated me for what I’d done?

I had to speak with a Psychiatrist for a few years after this happened, when I went back after the courthouse he had an envelope for me. Inside was a very loving letter from a woman I did not know. She told me how proud God was of me and once again she knew my parents were too. My angel had wrote me a letter to show she really had been in that courthouse bathroom. I didn’t dream it, she was real.

I believe this experience would change my faith, in a way it was like a foundation. My entire life seems focused around this entire story, everything goes back to this hearing and the reasoning behind it. But through it all God was always there. Do you have an angel story? I’d love to hear it.